City of the Wymyn Slaves

I’ve been around Grace Community Churchlong enough to have seen an entire cabinet’s worth of crackpots come and go. Some physically protest in front of our church.  Others merely hurl their internet screeds from a distance. Typically, they all have some petty ax to grind with something John either has taught or teaches.The more amusing reactions are from those metropolitan elites who on a whim think touching evangelical Christians will enlighten them in some fashion. Their reaction is precious. Like a bewildered anthropologist stumbling out of the jungle upon a previous undiscovered village of naked pig spearers.

The latest among these culturally diverse elites comes from a womyn named Anne Eggebroton, who teaches on wymyn and religion at a local state college down the road from us a few miles. She is also the founding member of the Evangelical and Ecumenical Womyn’s Caucus. For some unstated reason, she paid a visit to our church back around the middle of May when John was still preaching, before he left for his summer break.

What she experienced will be forever seared into her soul…

The Persistence of Patriarchy

When Anne stepped foot on our campus, she crossed through a tear in the fabric of the space-time continuum that transported her into an alternate universe. Sort of like Agent Dunham in that Fringe show. What she saw with her eyes horrified her beyond all imagination. Religious man tyrants preached from the pulpits and slave wymyn were walking around chained to baby strollers. Even worse, all the wymyn had been lobotomized to value child rearing and homemaking and quilting above all else. Worse still: they submitted and served their husband masters without question.

Staggered by what she was witnessing, Anne began to question the various wymyn she was meeting if our church taught biblical submission. A hearty “Yes!” came from the brainwashed wymyn folk. Making this positive affirmation even more heart breaking for Anne was the fact it came from intelligent professionals; one in particular was a physical therapist womyn.

Yes, Anne. I imagine for the worldly wise person like yourself, Christians who take the Bible seriously as a divine revelation breathed out by the living God, the concept of wives submitting to their husbands, and let us not forget, husbands loving and serving their wives, is a bit perplexing. But for a person who holds up man’s ways above God’s ways, I expect the visceral reaction recorded in your article.

A couple of things you should know about us, however, Anne. First, we genuinely believe our Creator has commanded the male-female relationships of headship and submission because He happens to know what is the wisest and best for His creatures. He wants His people for whom He has redeemed to live lives filled with the Spirit, and that entails providing spirit led regulations regarding male and female relationships. We also think homosexuality is a sin against God, what’s your position on that? But then secondly, we recoil from any notion of molding God into our image when our individual preferences and expectations are not being met in the manner we want. That includes when what God commands of us may be hard. We pray for strength, seek out our fellow Christians for support, and trust God’s providence during those times. Leaving from hard relationships should be a last resort.

Anne could take no more and hurried across the acres of parking lot surrounding our “mega church” to find the portal that would take her back to her reality. She had to quickly warn her sisters to beware.

One has to wonder, though, if Mr. Eggebroton looks across that parking lot at all those submissive wives chained to baby strollers and lets out a long, weary sigh.

BTW: See Al Mohler’s much less snarky article on Anne’s visit.
See Dan’s also.

13 thoughts on “City of the Wymyn Slaves

  1. Sadly, I expect that what would stand out to someone opposed to this article, would be the bold/italic over emphasis on the personal pronouns of God. Not that I don't get what is being said, or agree with it (I do on both counts), just that I imagine that while the first use of the bold italic HE> suggests the intended emphasis, each subsequent use comes off as patronizing.Don't get me wrong, if I am going to be patronizing, I try to reserve it for things that are worthy of it, and this certainly qualifies… I just think that the emphasis comes off as a tad more than snarky…Just saying, that is just my Canadian opinion – perhaps we northerners are simply too delicate?

  2. City of the Wymyn Slaves A RantOne good rant deserves another, I suppose.Anyways, Eggebroten is warning that persistent neo-patriarchy produces mindless, unthinking Stepford wives.She doesn't understand that she's created a strawman of biblical patriarchy.

  3. Hey Daniel,Long time brother. I still read you by the way. =-)That's a fair observation. I guess at times we can be a bit over the top with our snarkiness. I am not necessarily trying to win her sensibilities, though. I found it galling that she paints this stone age picture of our Church and never really bothered to genuinely ask around why we believe what we believe. A quick question to a couple of different folks walking in between Sunday school and worship doesn't really count as making an effort to understand. She is as noted above, setting up a cartoon strawman of what she hates so she can rip it down.

  4. What's ironic is how feminists like Elizabeth Edwards and Hillary Clinton act like wallflower wives who stand by their philandering husbands. For all the feminist rhetoric, they're remarkably submissive. Indeed, it's a parody of fundamentalism. Conservative Christianity doesn't tell wives to stand by their man no matter what. But Elizabeth Edwards put her husbands political ambitions ahead of everything else. And that's just one example.The problem is that feminists have no inner direction. No genuine self-worth. So they put up with things which would not be tolerated in a Christian marriage.

  5. Last I checked, Biblical submission doesn't mean a woman can't go to college, get a job, divorce her husband if he commits adultery, nor does she have to agree with his every whim, opinion, and fancy. If anything, it simply means that the woman is supposed to support her husband and build him up, encouraging him to be the leader and man he was meant to be. And the husband commanded to love her and support her. Not force her to make him a sandwich if she's tired or keep her from going back to get her master's degree, which is what I always figure feminists imagine, but which I have never seen in any conservative Christian family.

  6. This is one of the more petty and intentionally combative articles I've read in a while. I urge you reconsider whether contributions of this kind really serve to advance the Kingdom. Beyond that, its between you and God.To respond to a few of the comments:@Steve: Do you really think Clinton is "standing by" Bill out of some sense of submission or lack of self-worth? Really? It seems pretty clear that their marriage is one of convenience, and that she's still married to him because its politically expedient.

  7. Buddy.I wanted it to be intentionally combative. Whether or not it serves the advancement of the kingdom is for God to determine. It does, however, show the shallow foolishness in the way this woman thinks. Sometimes, mockers need to be mocked.

  8. I find that women only want to be feminists when they can reap the "rewards." They never truly want both sides of their own coin.

  9. I admit I wondered what her take would have been had she attended the WDW conference this last weekend and seen so many women from so many places who were hungry for the Word so that they could use it rightly personally and in ministry.

  10. I'm shocked that Anne Eggebrotoncould found an organization with the patriarchal name of "Evangelical and EcuMENical Womyn's Caucus". Freudian slip? Liberated womyn know the word should be ecumynical.A-myn to that.

  11. Pingback: Answering Survivor Bloggers and Other Sundry Theological Cranks | hipandthigh

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